films
3:09 p.m. || 2011-02-06 |
Damn I want to make films! Sigh. Being a lifestyle journalist is great, it's lots of fun with lots of perks. (Despite how much I suck at it,) I want to make films again.
Yeahhhhhhh so. Friends make me happy. & meeting people and friends at events, pretty surprised that both Clement & Bjorn remembered me! & strangers who remember me, and I love how quickly conversations change from work-related (ie where are you from?) immediately to non-work-related (ie I want to go Europe & Japan! Oh Poly students all use Macbooks! etc.) Speaking of which,
Exam results for the past semester were finally out. I did the worst ever in my NTU life. It sucks to see the cGPA being pulled down so much when you're already a bloody year 3 and by right GPA shouldn't move that much. Perhaps if I were to find excuses for myself, it could be due to the wonders exchange does, it could be filming which ate up majority of time and energy. But nope. I am just going to say, it was still a great semester, every single module I took was worth it (except for GV12 hurhur), because I learned and experienced so much. Heck the bad grades, I'm still gonna be proud of myself because I learned to play the shakuhachi and improved a lot, because I had so much fun doing radio & my DJing skills improved too, because I got to try my hand at being director and producer, and the final film received a rather surprising grade, because my FCP skills improved too, because I was praised for drama, because my interaction-performance piece was showcased at the end of sem's exhibition, and because I actually enjoy business law and found it interesting. So HECK THE GRADES SIA. I found passion in filming & radio (& interest in bizlaw and shakuhachi) and the fire for performance arts & acting continued burning. which is damn awesome. On another note, I'm getting more used to worklife, I'm getting a little faster, I'm happier & I finally found someone to click with, albeit out of the office and our sour relationship.
Depressing how expensive everything is, but one can dream right? Now till June: Find a long weekend to go on Malaysia railway trip. June-August: Japan GSS/Europe GSS December: Taipei New Year countdown with XY! & the 2012 summer: Work-travel USA with dot!
First week of internship was terrible, probably because of the dread that has been building up for ages inside me, because I'm afraid to talk to people, because of how lousy my Chinese and writing is, because it felt so foreign and it felt like a world I totally don't belong in. (Ok I just proved that I'm an extremely anti-social person who has extremely low self confidence.) Hence, the negativities build upon each other and the feeling of dread snowballed. It was so bad, that I cannot bring myself to talk about my day to anyone. Whenever people mention 'work', I'll feel very depressed. When parents ask about work, I'll be very hot tempered. When friends ask 'how's work', I'll ignore the question, because I really don't want to talk about it and be reminded of it. I was also afraid that they wouldn't understand if I tell them. Any mention and reminder of work, will immediately put me into a very bad mood 90% of the time. Now it's week 2, and I'm getting more used to it. Still lousy at Chinese, still lousy at writing, still shy but getting used to it and liking the nature of the job more. Most importantly, mentions of work don't put me in a bad mood anymore. :D Hope this optimism snowballs up!
Listening to 933 now, and yes the topic is O levels results. I feel so old. 想当年。。。 Then there was the dilemma whether to stay on at JJC, or go somewhere else, and where. Do they even have the "first three months" system now? I remember nanyang, I remember that day we were all sitting in the hall, I remember my results were probably in the last 20% of the nanyang cohort, but probably the top 20% of the singapore cohort. >< Haha, and ultimately none of it matters. Its not even because of the reminder of Olevels that made me feel old today. Even before so, Jin doing STARS in office today already reminded me, how after intern end and when we all go back to school, and when people return from exchange..I'll be a year 4. The last year of 16 years of life as a student. Uni final year. FREAKING OLD.
1. I spent 6 months overseas, it was also the first time I travelled alone. & I love it. 2. I found the one and only country I don't mind migrating to, no prize for guessing where. 3. The first time I permed my hair was in Taipei. 4. The first time I made purple contact lens, was in the school�s supermarket. I also made huge weird looking spectacles at the same time at the same place. 5. The first time I ride on a motorbike. I fell in love with the thrill and excitement of it, and the sense of security holding on to the person, also the sense of trust when not holding on to the person. 6. The first time I went clubbing. (with the exception of the typical school D&D and hall bash) I was even pulled up to the podium once. Although I still left quickly and walked around outside in the fresh air instead LOL. 7. I watched the world cup and not just being concerned with betting results that my dad used to place. Although I wasn't that interested in the matches until the finals, I love how heartwarming it was gathered around the sofa with chips and beer with friends. 8. The first time I got drunk (or so they say, I still insist I was conscious and can remember), was on Russian vodka, and there was so much drama that night, in the house. 9. The first time celebrating my birthday overseas, it was also the best birthday ever. 10. I was so slack on schoolwork on exchange, that drama was actually the most stressful. 11. The year that I attended the most awesome classes: drama, dance/stage fighting/etc, yoga, game theory, scriptwriting, photojourn in CUC. Joining their drama classes and experiencing the all-rounded drama education system under super respected drama teachers and sharing all their shit/stress/joy in their drama world, means a lot to me. Then I continued with awesome modules of 3 drama/performance mods, 2 film mods & radio in NTU. 12. ISP, nuff said. 13. The first time I really like someone overseas, and one of them, especially so. The kind that make you glow and keep smiling to yourself and then your friend would say "why are you so happy today" and another would say "ohhh I know why" and give you the knowing look. HAHAHA. 14. I found the best accommodation in my life so far, the hostel at Hualien. The auntie who owns the house, is also the best auntie I ever met. I swear to bring my mum there someday, I'm sure my mum will be happy there. 15. I went out to the Pacific Ocean, and saw many many dolphins. It was also the first time on such rocky waves and feeling a little seasick. 16. The first time I spent the entire night in Alishan in the room of a group of 6 guys whom I�ve never met before in my life. We didn�t sleep, played cards and laughed all the way. I trust their good vibes completely. 17. The first time in my life I walked so much, and climbed mountains, and walked on the roads for miles. 18. I found my twin. Cab drivers think we�re sisters and people in school mixed us up. I became the evil twin and she the good one. 19. I saw snow! I saw real snow in Beijing, I ran around, I fell, I laid down in the snow-covered field, I dropped my camera in the snow, I vandalized and left my mark on many cars, I ate icecream and went out in tshirt & slippers in winter, I love it. (ok la, I only went to as far as the neighbourhood supermarket in slippers and the time I went out in a shirt I borrowed ZY�s coat in the end) 20. I saw one of the seven wonders, the great wall! I climbed the great wall twice. 21. I saw the most beautiful sunrise & clouds from the Jade mountain around Alishan. 22. I ate stinky tofu, and loved it. Especially the Taiwan ones, Shanghai�s ones are not bad too. 23. Having your own house means holding parties and having friends over, meaning the house is always crowded! 24. I was stalked by a guy I met at a gay park. (yes park not pub) The hospitality from another guy I met at a theatre also scares me. 25. I paid to watch a concert, two concerts actually. Show Luo's & Jay Chou's.
<3
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